mini madness

This has been a LONG time coming! I have to admit that, back in the day...2.5 kids day....i had a minivan...*sigh*, yes, it was an awesome machine (not). It was the hardest trade in my life when I handed over the keys to my Nissan pathfinder for a big stupid windstar. At the time, the whole...'im a mommy, gotta get a van' thing took over. Im thinking this is somewhat similar to menopause, uncontrollable urge to buy minivan,, no cure....It lasted almost a year, when i had to pull myself out of it and got an expedition, now a tahoe. I think the SUV is the cooler way to tote the kids around without becoming victim to a minivan. Something happens to these women that drive minivans. if they dont get out of the clutches, they turn into satan behind the wheel. Im not sure if they are mad that they have a minivan or if they think they are the controllers of the paved streets we all travel. Whatever it is, they pretty much suck. I cant count the times that ive seen a minivan nearly take someone out...another car, animal, old person in a scooter, mailman, ice cream truck, child IN school crossing walk....they are so worried that they will be late for soccer or girl scouts or just trying to get everything done so they can get the hell OUT of that stupid minivan! Dont misunderstand, i have done my fair share of populating this world and i fell victim to the mini, but i found the strength to get out and still have a vehicle to tote all 5 kids to everything and maintain some level of 'cool' doing it. I dont feel like i need to prove anything by driving like a nascar driver or seeing how many ppl i can injure or scare to the point of pissing themselves while trying to escape a lunatic driver. Honestly somedays, evil thoughts run through my head about pretending my tahoe is a monster truck and plowing right over about 50 minis. I think there should be a support group or intervention for ppl driving or thinking about getting a mini. If youre my friend and you drive a mini, break away, save yourself!
k im done......